Weekend Fun 52: Nixon had Watergate, Binay has Dasma Gate

Two jokes from Jim Paredes, a famous Filipino singer, posted in his facebook wall:

(1) Nixon had Watergate. Binay has Dasma gate

(2) Attention Napocor, Meralco: Habang kulang ng power sa buong Pilipinas, may excessive power surge sa Makati! :-) 

The Binay family is the longest-reigning, most politically influential in Makati City, the financial capital of the Philippines. Currently in power are Vice President Jojo Binay, daughter Sen. Nancy Binay, another daughter Congresswoman Abby Binay, and son Makati Mayor Junjun Binay. The wife of the VP was also a former Mayor of Makati.

Last November 30 this year, an incident happened inside Dasmarinas Village, Makati City. Before 12 midnight, Mayor Junjun and his backup vehicles wanted to get out of the Banyan gate, fronting Mckinley Road. Dasma village security guards that night did not allow him to exit. The policy is by 10pm, minor gates like Banyan, Lumbang and Mantrade gates, entry only for cars with Dasma village resident sticker, but even residents cannot exit there. They must use the two main gates at Palm Ave. and Pasay Road.

The Mayor and his security insisted that they should get out of that gate, a stand off occurred. The guards at the gate called more guards while the Mayor called the Makati police. Pinoy humor kicks in, as usual, with these photos, all posted in facebook. The "real reason" why the Mayor could not get out of the gate -- Gandalf stopped them. :-)

During the brief stand off, a guard of the Mayor was caught on CCTV loading bullets in his gun and went to the village security guards. Scenes like this attracted public anger, as expected. Mayabang, arogante.

When the Makati police came, they forced open the bar, then dragged the three village security to the police station. Earlier report from the Inquirer said the 3 guards were dragged then detained for four hours before being allowed to go back to the village.

One beauty of CCTVs. They allow the photos and videos to speak for themselves.

Meanwhile, two more jokes from Jim Paredes:

(3) 'There are people bent on putting my family's name in bad light.' – Nancy Binay

Ay naku Mam, Totoo yan. Kilala ko sila. Si Jojo, JunJun, Nancy, Elenita, Abigail daw ang mga pangalan..

(4) Let’s not make a big deal about it. It was only a Christmas get-together between the guards & bodyguards. Mayor was even invited. Notice the Christmas lights? The giveaway were umbrelas. The PNP upon hearing about the occasion joined in..

Case closed!

Ang pamilya. Bow.
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See also: 

Weekend Fun 41: Nancy Binay, Grace Poe, Other Politicians, May 25, 2013
Weekend Fun 48: On Being Old and Crazy, September 14, 2013
Weekend Fun 49: Lefties Songs, October 12, 2013 

Weekend Fun 50: Pacquiao, Rios and Pacman U., November 30, 2013 

Weekend Fun 51: Martilyo Gang Jokes, December 20, 2013 

Anti-Smoke Belching Racket, Part 5, April 02, 2013 

Pol. Ideology 38: Branding Via Clans, Not Philosophy, April 05, 2013

Weekend Fun 51: Martilyo Gang Jokes

A few days ago, a jewelry shop in SM North Edsa in Quezon City was robbed by a robbery group known as the “Martilyo Gang”. This group allegedly use martilyo (hammer) to break open the stalls and/or the glass boxes, steal and run away in crowded areas. 

After the incident, Pinoy humor strikes, as always. Like these jokes and images, taken from various sources in the web.

1. Sinong rapper ang bawal na ngayon pumasok sa mga malls sa Pinas? -- Si MC Hammer. (from Dennis Arroyo).

2. Anong SUV ang bawal ibenta malapit sa mga malls sa Pinas? The Hummer.

3. Sinong movie character ang bawal na rin sa mga movies in the malls? Si Thor.

4. Aside from gold, silver and other mineral products, what else to speculate in a stock or goods market? – Hammer. The price will certainly go up because it would be heavily regulated and become harder to get.

5. BAWAL NA NGAYON ang martilyo sa malls.
Pag bibili ka raw, sa labas mo na ito iki-claim.

At napangiti ang members ng MASO GANG.

6. DILG Sec. Mar Roxas suggested ordinance to ban hammers inside malls, also crowbars and other hardware materials. Ang galing ng logic ano?

7. New SM motto: We got everything here, except hammer.

8. SM ROBBERS inuna munang kunin ang mga pabango bago ang mga alahas.

Sa susunod mga kuyang, maligo muna bago magnakaw, ok?

* Note. ALL images here taken from the web, not one I have produced. Cheers.

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See also:
Weekend Fun 47: San Miguel, Galman and Inuman, August 31, 2013 
Weekend Fun 48: On Being Old and Crazy, September 14, 2013 
Weekend Fun 49: Lefties Songs, October 12, 2013 

Weekend Fun 50: Pacquiao, Rios and Pacman U., November 30, 2013

Weekend Fun 48: On Being Old and Crazy

Early this week, I posted this in my facebook wall:

"You can never be old and wise if you were never young and crazy. "-- Zeno Martinez
Tama nga naman. But why aspire to be old and wise when you can be old and crazy?

Lots of likes and funny comments from friends, including friend from UP, Zerno Martinez himself. Zero has a good sense of humor, posting one liners in his wall. Below are some of those from his wall, and my additions.

If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried. -- Zeno
If at first you don't succeed, try and try until you will die. -- Nonoy

If at first you don't succeed...skydiving is not for you. -- Zeno
.. skydiving is not for you. You can aspire to be a manananggal de aswang. -- Nonoy

Someone once said: "It's not cheating if it works and no one catches you."
Congress and Senate version: "It's not stealing if..." -- Zeno
Congress and Senate version: "It's not stealing if it works and even if one catches you." -- Nonoy

Sometimes the road less traveled is less traveled for a reason. -- Zeno
Sometimes the road less traveled is because the chicken is crossing that road. -- Nonoy

Honesty is the best policy but insanity is the best defense. -- Zeno
You may b e right, I maybe crazy, but it's just maybe a lunatic you're looking for. -- Billy Joel
Insanity is the best defense, lunacy is the best offense, and Honesty is a song by Billy Joel. -- Nonoy

You can't make a person love you...you can only stalk them and hope for the best. -- Zeno
You can stalk a person and hope that he/she loves it. -- Nonoy

Zeno quote.
Nonoy quote: The unreasonable is the mother of all invention and reason. 

STOP blaming yourself. It's hard to do but with a little practice, you'll get there. -- Zeno
Stop blaming yourself. Delegate. It allows you to blame somebody else. – Nonoy

My advice to "be old and crazy" was a joke and yet many friends agree with it. Are they serious? I myself do not wish to be "old and crazy". Rather, I wish to be "young and crazy" forever. The fact that I think that I can be forever young already makes me crazy. hehehe.

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Meanwhile, an intermission from another friend's fb wall posting...

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See also:
Weekend Fun 44: Cow Economics, June 22, 2013
Weekend Fun 45: Life is Like a Bikini, It is Brief, June 30, 2013 
Weekend Fun 46: Pork Barrel's New Names, August 25, 2013 
Weekend Fun 47: San Miguel, Galman and Inuman, August 31, 2013