Saturday, December 17, 2011

Weekend Fun 24: Water and the Professionals

A friend way back in UP in the 80s, Dennis Arroyo, likes posting funny lines and graphics in his facebook wall. One of his recent postings is this:

Then it generated lots of funny one-liner comments and additions from his fb friends. But most of such additions are not related to water, so I put in my own additions. Dennis gave me permission to write a fun-blog about the exchanges, but I will discard postings not related to water. You see, I want to "stick to the issue", hehehe. Below are the exchanges, only related, directly or indirectly, to water, which was the original theme of his fb wall posting.
    • Victor  Dear Opportunist, I poisoned the water. Hugs, Antagonist
      23 hours ago ·  ·  2

    • Dennis Arroyo Dear Antagonist, no need to poison the water. We had scooped it from the UP swimming pool. Fatalist.

  • Nonoy Oplas Dear Opportunist and Antagonist, I made money selling bottled water out of a fluidy swimming pool, selling poison, and selling anti-poison concoction, thank you all -- The Capitalist.
    17 hours ago · 

  • Nonoy Oplas Dear Capitalist, water is social and communal property, not private. We shall then expropriate any private ownership of bottled water, swimming pool water, laikewater and sparkling water. -- The Socialist.
    17 hours ago · 

  • Nonoy Oplas Dear Socialist, not all water are the same. There is the basic H20 water, there is alkaline water, sparkling water, fluidy water, creek and estero water, etc. It is therefore not viable to expropriate ownership and collectivize all watah. -- the chemist.
    3 hours ago · 

  • Nonoy Oplas Dear Chemist, water is not all chemical substances. There are also biological substances there, living or non-living matter. -- The Biologist.
    about an hour ago · 

  • Nonoy Oplas Dear Biologist and Chemist, true that there are chemical and biological substances added to pure water. But without motion (water flow and waves) and energy (solar and kinetic), any living chemical and biological substances there will perish. -- The Physicist
    about an hour ago · 

  • Nonoy Oplas Dear scientists (bio, physicist, chem), all matter and energy have their degree of scarcity at some point and time. Thus, the price system was invented to reflect on those scarcity. Non-scarcity means price is zero. So while chemical & bio substances plus motion may be free at some point, pure water is not, so it must have a price. - The economist
    about an hour ago · 

  • Nonoy Oplas Dear Economist, scarcity and pricing of water is relative. In a continuous hydrological cycle, water can be unlimited and hence, non-scarce. Your price system sucks. -- The Meteorologist
    about an hour ago · 

  • Dennis Arroyo Dear Physicist, earth is not the only planet with water. Keppler22b is in the news. - The Astrophysicist.
    about an hour ago · 

  • Nonoy Oplas Dear Astrophysicist, not only planets Earth and Keppler 22b have water, there are millions or billions of possible planets and satellites from other constellations which have water. -- The Cosmologist
    about an hour ago · 

  • Nonoy Oplas Dear ALL scientists, anthropogenic global warming (AGW) is true, debate is over, we will soon have less rain, less water in this planet, so send us more money. -- Al Gore-ologist
    about an hour ago · 

  • Nonoy Oplas Dear Al Gore and UN, AGW is a scam, we have more water and flooding recently than in previous decades. -- Ondoy/Pepeng/Pedring victimologist
    about an hour ago · 

  • Dennis Arroyo Dear Economist, I have learned to make a killing selling bottled water in my food courts by making tap water scarce and inconvenient. -- The mall industrialist.
    about an hour ago · 

  • Nonoy Oplas Dear SM Industrialist, we do the same at the airport, we do not provide even drinking fountain and then we charge passengers P750 terminal fee, we beat yah. -- NAIA bureaucratist
    about an hour ago · 

  • Dennis Arroyo Dear NAIA bureaucratist, NAIA 1 is a museum piece and we crowded passengers look like herds of cattle or protesters from Occupy NAIA. -- The Disgruntled Passenger-ist.
    59 minutes ago · 

  • Nonoy Oplas Dear Passengerist, have patience with NAIA Bureaucratist. Why, we even charge you P1,620 travel tax for zero service, not even compli drinks, we beat them all. -- DOT and PTA bureaucratist
    56 minutes ago · 

  • Dennis Arroyo Dear NAIA Bureaucratist, you also have to work on that terrible air traffic that delays flights, tests our patience, and wastes fuel. -- The Disgruntled Passenger-ist.
    53 minutes ago · 

  • Nonoy Oplas Dear Passengerist, since your flights and travels consume more fuel which contributes to AGW and less rain, less snow and more drought, you shd give us carbon offset fees. -- WWF and Greenpeace scammist
    48 minutes ago · 

  • Dennis Arroyo Dear Scammist, my carbon footprint is larger than yours. Bwahaha! :) -- Serial Conference Attendist.
    46 minutes ago · 

  • Nonoy Oplas Dear Scammist, I don't believe in AGW and its ecological robbery so I don't feel guilty, bwa hahaha -- international travelist
    44 minutes ago · 

  • Nonoy Oplas Dear int'l travelist, CO2 is a useful gas, it's the gas that you and the scammers exhale, it's the gas that your plants and trees use to produce their own food via photosynthesis, and trees and plants contribute to healthy hydrological cycle and more rains. -- The Biologist
    41 minutes ago · 

  • Nonoy Oplas Dear Biologist and travelist, CO2 is the gas that we use in our Cokei and beer. You open the bottle or can, bubbles come out, cute right? That's CO2, it's cool. -- Coke and Beer Industrialist
    39 minutes ago · 

  • Dennis Arroyo Dear International Travelist, work time is limited and I have sunk much of it again on Facebook. Will have to get back to work for now. -- The Relativity Physicist.
    34 minutes ago · 

  • Nonoy Oplas Dear Coke, you give us millions of $ in past donation and you'll give more millions in the future. We demonize CO2 but we don't care if you usi CO2 in your drinks, we only care about your money, thank you. -- WWF scammist
    34 minutes ago · 

  • Nonoy Oplas Dear Relative Physicist, you said E=MC2 (squarred). Work is related to E and if you drink more water, you will have more energy and you can work more. -- FB lurkist
    32 minutes ago ·

  • Nonoy Oplas Dear Biologist, volcanoes also spit out lots of CO2 and many other gases. Since trees love CO2 and trees are among the natural regulators of hydrological cycle, more CO2, more trees, more rains, more water, cool. -- The Volcanologist
    8 minutes ago · 

  • Nonoy Oplas Dear Volcanologist, please don't be too parochial. Volcanoes are only part of overall geological movements and changes. Earthquakes also release lots of CO2 and other gases. -- The Geologist

  • Nonoy Oplas Dear Geologist, you study earthquakes and rocks, but your rocks suck. Our rock rocks, people dance a lot, they sweat a lot, they need to drink lots of water or they will dehydrate. Long live our rock. -- Rock band fanaticist

I did not post these in Dennis' wall but here are additional letters:

Dear rock band fanaticist, you sing and rock a lot, sometimes scream and jump a lot, you're sweating and would get dehydrated, don't drink too much beer, drink more water, we're selling different bottled water. -- Canteenist

Dear Canteenist, is your water clear and purified enough? Are you sure it is 100.00 percent free of any harmful bacteria? We have great water purifiers here, all sizes, all models. -- Water Purist.

Dear Water Purist, not all bacteria are harmful, some are useful, they help our body's immune system. -- Internist.

Happy Weekend.

See also:
Weekend fun 16: Gaddafi cartoons, March 19, 2011
Weekend fun 17: Political jokes, May 15, 2011
Weekend fun 18. Gloria Arroyo cartoons, June 11, 2011
Weekend fun 19: Sic o Clock News, June 19, 2011
Weekend fun 20: Taga-UP Diliman ka Kung..., August 20, 2011
Weekend fun 21: Humor in global financial turmoil, August 21, 2011
Weekend fun 22: Functions and equations, September 17, 2011
Weekend fun 23: Economists joke, September 24, 2011

No comments: