CAUTION: this truck is full of political promises.
2. Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it everywhere, diagnosing it incorrectly and applying all the wrong remedies. -- Anonymous
3. These are my principles. If you don't like them, I have others. -- Groucho Marx
5. Politics is the science of seeing and forecasting what will happen in the future, and the ability to explain afterwards why they did not happen. -- Anonymous
Cong. Pacquiao: Kung nag-condom ang tatay ko, walang 8 division world champion ang Pilipinas ngayon.
Cong. Lagman: Kung nag-condom si Diosdado Macapagal, wala sanang Gloria at malalaking problema ang Pilipinas ngayon.
American contractor takes out a tape measure, does some measurement, works some figures with a pencil, and says: 'Well, I'll figure out the job will run about $900: $400 for materials, $400 for my crew and $100 profit for me.'
Filipino contractor does not measure or figure, but leans over to the White House official and whispers: '$2,700.'
White House official, incredulous says, 'What? You did not even measure like the other guys! How did you come up with such a high figure? How do you expect me to consider your service with that bid?'
'Easy, the Filipino explains', '$1,000 for you, $1,000 for me and we hire the guy from Mexico (winks)
The next day the Filipino got the contract.
A: In the US they go to jail. In the Philippines, they go to the US.
If a Congressman makes sex, it's called Congressional Insertion.
10. Erap's Wisdom:
* Don't judge a book for you are not a Judge.
* Birds of the same feathers are the same birds.
* Tell me who your friends are, and I'll tell you mine.
* An apple a day is 7 apples a week.
11. Presidential mottos:
Marcos - Mabuhay ang Pilipino
Cory - Tayo ay Pilipino
Ramos - Taas noon, Pilipino
Erap - Mabuhay, Casino Filipino
Gloria - Hello Garcillano